Confused about not being confused.

I felt like this post needed it's very own space

I know that I am at the stage in my life where marriage is a GREAT goal. It is what I want, it is what I SHOULD want. However, it's not that easy! Finding a worthy, dateable, funny, compassionate, church loving man is NOT simple. Especially when yo live somewhere like HAVASU!

And then there is this side of me that says: "Hey, you are good at being single. You have a great life. You are living worthy, you are blessed like CRAZY. You have the job you want, you have had the opportunity to be close to family. You don't have to worry about LEARNING to live with someone. You don't have to think about making someone happy, or learning how to be happy with someone. Life is good. And if you are worthy the Lord will make it right." That's a cheap way out.

And why is it when you DO find someone who you could like...that likes you, there are obstacles. Like: the distance between you...geographically, AND spiritually! A friend told me tonight, (and I am paraphrasing...I am sure she wont mind...) "You are living RIGHT, you do not want to get into a situation where you have to start 'fixing' things." It is SO true. I don't want to have to "get there" I AM there. I want to find someone who is there too!!!

I am also starting to realize that as much as single life is wonderful I am missing out on things like:

Loving

Being loved

Sharing thoughts/feelings

Making a home

Being sealed and having the wonderful blessings of the temple

Having children

Having someone to make decisions with

Laughing with someone who gets YOU

Smiling and knowing what the other is thinking

Having goals together

Staying up late and giggling

Going on dates

Sharing secrets

Snuggling

Holding hands

Sitting with that special someone at church

The priesthood in my home

Someone to call my own...and have him call me his

Fighting over what movie to watch

Laughing at the disasters we encounter

Being a wife

Being a mother

Feeling wanted

Love for eternity!

I have also come to the realization that *I* Kathryn M. Scott CAN be picky about who I marry!! For some reason people think they should "settle" or instead HOPE things will get better or change in a person. I am ALL for being positive. But WHY would I decide to choose someone who cannot take me to the temple, who cannot offer me the priesthood. WHY would I NOT fight with everything I have to make happen what I know is right. What I KNOW the Lord wants. What I KNOW, without ANY doubt in my mind, heart and spirit to be true? I say to you I WILL!! I will NOT settle. I will live worthy, and let the Lord do the rest! It's not too much to ask, because I KNOW the Lord provides a way!

Things I MUST have in an Eternal Companion:

Worthy/Active Priesthood holder

CAN and WANTS to take me to the temple

Service oriented

Wants children

Can laugh at himself and with me

Has and makes goals

Wants to be better, and help me be better

Isn't complacent

Appreciates music

Good Listener

Easy/out going

There are probably a lot more...maybe I will update as they come to me...But that is a pretty good start!

Now...just to BECOME all of those things so I make it fair game!